My Self Healing Journey

"Holistic" has become a buzzword in today's fast-paced, consumer-driven society. Companies are even positioning their products to be marketed as "natural, healthy, and organic," whether they are or not. This trend of health and wellness is developing into a significant industry. According to The Global Wellness Institute, a leading source for authoritative wellness industry research, the global wellness economy was valued at $4.5 trillion in 2018. The US is leading this growing trend with the largest market size in the health and wellness industry, valued at $52.5 billion. It makes sense that this area of commerce is growing so quickly. We are innately and instinctively wired toward the desire for happiness, health, and wellness. It is part of our instinct to survive. So why is it that the foundational principles of holistic health and wellness are still regarded with skepticism? 

What images do you see when you think of wellness and holistic health? Perhaps you associate serene water landscapes, day spas, and women holding yoga poses in nature. Advertising continually bombards us with these images trying to convince us that their product will make us happy and well. These marketing images spin a narrative that wellness is buying the right leggings or the right brand of kombucha. All of this is a distraction from the deeper meaning of these trending concepts.  

The concept of holism is entirely intuitive and still eludes our understanding and application in modern society. The term "holism" originated with Jan Smuts in his 1926 book "Holism and Evolution." In its purest and unadulterated meaning, holism is the idea that various systems should be viewed as wholes, not merely as a collection of parts. The human body is a wonderful example of a holistic system. We can observe separate organs and their functions, but understanding how they all work together gives us a well-rounded understanding of how the body operates. 

Any child can comprehend that we are all part of a whole. Native cultures understood that what hurts one hurts the entire community. It makes sense that stressful thoughts create anxiety, manifesting as tense shoulders, upset stomach, trouble sleeping, tightening of the jaw, and grinding of the teeth. We observe these causes and effects daily, and yet when reflecting on our own mental, physical, and emotional health, we rarely look for more profound reasons and connections.

It may seem a lot simpler to reach for the painkiller when you have a headache, but a pill will not resolve the underlying mental and emotional stressors causing the headache. In Western Medicine, the definition of health is the absence of disease and therefore seeks to relieve symptoms. Holistic health looks at the mental, physical, and emotional causes of disease and illness and strives to bring the whole person into a healthy balance with themselves, their relationships, and surroundings. This Holistic perspective offers us a lot of agency and demands that we take responsibility for our experiences and wellness. 

Western Medicine is beginning to recognize psychosomatic illness, physical illnesses caused by mental or emotional factors, as very real phenomena. Thirty years ago, a common belief was that psychosomatic illnesses were "imaginary" and "all in the patient's mind." Today, we can understand that psychosomatic illness is pointing us again in the direction of holistic healing.

I first showed signs of eczema as an infant and developed the rash around my navel. Growing up, the inside of my arms would painfully burn and itch. The pediatrician recommended hydrocortisone cream and oatmeal baths. For years I used these methods to soothe the angry, red rash until I reached puberty. My symptoms spread and increased with my raging hormones. Throughout middle school, high school, and into my early twenties, the rash covered my face, neck, breasts, the inside of my arms, and stomach.

Today, it is common knowledge that eczema is a psychosomatic disease. At that time, no doctor mentioned that I might be in emotional and mental distress. I went to allergists, dermatologists, specialists, but no one could give me an answer. In hindsight, I can clearly see the correlation between my eczema and my mental-emotional state. My home life's emotional and mental pressures weighed on me, and my skin was acting out as a way to bring attention to the fact I was suffering, but no one could read the signs. The lack of helpful information made me feel hopeless—a deep self-loathing developed. Every time I looked in the mirror, I could not see myself, just the ugly, red blotches that were suffocating me. 

I was raised in an environment that did not tolerate negative emotions, especially anger. I was a highly emotional child, extremely sensitive and prone to outbursts. These emotions inside of me had no outlet. They were finding a voice through my skin, and my skin was screaming! I began to turn the anger I felt inside toward myself, and the more my self-hatred grew, the worse my symptoms became. I resorted to alcohol and marijuana as coping mechanisms. If I was drunk and stoned, at least, I couldn't feel the tempest raging inside of me constantly. My symptoms worsened but being numb to it all made it bearable.

At the age of eighteen, I discovered alternative healing modalities. I went to a Shiatsu Therapist. For the first time in my life, I was introduced to the concept of holistic health. I learned the effect my dietary and lifestyle choices were having on my skin. He gave me dietary instructions, herbal remedies and would massage my organs weekly. I learned that the skin is an organ. I quit smoking and drinking, and I began to see real changes in my skin. Symptoms would return if I strayed from the strict diet and lifestyle choices, but making healthier choices improved my mental, physical and emotional state.

Years later, I moved to New York to study acting. This lead me down the path of learning about the interconnection between our physical and emotional bodies. In my research, I discovered the importance of liver health for the skin and the effects of unprocessed anger on these organs. I started to explore Liver Flushes and healthy constructive ways to release years of suppressed anger. This protocol and perspective changed everything. I am proud to say that I am 100% eczema free today and have not had an outbreak in years.

I will admit, facing our health issues through a holistic lens is not easy. It would be a lot simpler to compartmentalize our symptoms instead of taking a long hard look inside and asking ourselves what is going on. But this reflection and inquiry are essential to living with ease and longevity. It is worthwhile to take this moment and consider your health issues or the health complications that run in your family? What belief or emotional pain exists beneath the illness? What is the wound that reinforces your unhealthy habits? By addressing the underline cause, you set yourself on a track for balance, integration, and true holistic wellness.